Friday, November 19, 2010

Retarded Me

People think I'm having fun at home. People think I like spending my time watching dramas, playing games, reading mangas and watching videos of soshi. Let me tell you this, I'm no where close to happy doing all these day and night. You people don't understand what it's like to sit here everyday hoping to get a call from one of the many potential employers that you have sent an email to.

I've been doing this same shit for months and no, I'm not liking how I spent my life everyday. You may say I can just go and simply find a job first. Easier said than done? I've applied for lower level positions but they deemed me as overqualified because I have a degree. Degree job employers sees me as under-qualified because my results sucks and I have no work or internship experience. I'm caught in the damn middle where nobody wants to give me a chance. Not being a PR isn't really helping either.

Find a part-time job? Do you think I have never thought of it? Sure my results are bad but I'm not lacking of common sense. I CAN'T work part-time, I have no valid pass to allow me to do so. The same for any other full time odd jobs, employers will not want to apply a work permit for a person they know will leave once he gets a better job offer.

Sure I brought this upon myself. If I had studied harder or made more initiative to get an internship, I probably wouldn't be in this position now but that's all in the past and I can't do shit about it now.

I'm not proud of myself, I'm 23 with a University Degree yet I've been leeching off my parents for God knows how long already.

Should I just run back to Malaysia and try to get a job there? Then again there's the transportation issue there.. and my room.. if I don't find a replacement I'll still have to pay for the rent...

Fuck.. maybe I should just spend the money I have left in my bank on some last minute vocal course and go for the JYP auditions... =.=

Just realized I was supposed to blog about the kpopnight... but never really had the heart to do it.. I'll just leave it at that... sigh.. blogging has just turned into an output for my whines....